Friday, May 11, 2007

In other news: Baby drivers can't read street signs

A new study making the rounds in the press concludes that iPods could cause pacemakers to malfunction. A very serious concern indeed. But to show you how the perfect headline can get ahead of itself let's take a closer look:

It was "a study presented by a 17-year-old high school student to a meeting of heart specialists Thursday"

My favorite quote: "'Most pacemaker patients are not iPod users,' Jongnarangsin said."

You don't say.

Look, I'm not discounting the kid's study. It's actually an important finding as our populace moves towards a generation where on-person peripherals are as important as clean underwear. The problem is that this is nothing more than an overemphasized headline and it has as much real value as the latest news on Paris (the tramp, not the city). What's wrong with journalists today?!

1 comment:

Andrew said...

First of all, I think it's a great idea to mash up ipods with pacemakers. Doesn't your heart beat just a little faster when you listen to the latest Nine Inch Nails song (or maybe in your case the soundtrack to Wicked)? Should the Ticker Challenged be denied that joy?

Second, I for one am impressed by any 17 year old that does such research. Of course, when I was 17, I would make fun of such nerds, undoubtedly headed toward Harvard (like the dude in my high school who actually wore a belt with "Harvard" on it! Ha!).

Third, you know that this incompatibility with pacemakers is part of Jobs' plan to take over the world, don't you? There was just a press release on Tues about the iHeart, due to launch in time for Christmas 2007.

Ken, you're so cynical.