Saturday, July 15, 2006

Hide the potions, it's the cops!

Terra Nova and BN blogroll resident have been talking about the recent news that the Korean government will start levying taxes on RMT (real money trading) for MMORPGs. I did a double-take in the TN article when I came across this phrase, "a Korean prosecutor who is in charge of anti-cybercrime division...". What's that? An anti-cybercrime division!? Sweet!

Why don't we have a cybercrime division? What? We do? Oh... Well, that's not the same. We need something else like the Koreans, but better!

Yup, with a name like that, it's gotta cool. It'd be Miami Vice meets CHiPs meets MMOs. I can see it now... yes, the future will look like this:

Diary of a Anti-Cybercrime Detective

July 14, 2009:
1:06AM - Start of the day. The biometric thing broke down again. Frank just waved me in so why do we bother? Got to the desk and stupid Jones left a mess. The crumbs tastes like pumpkin muffin. Means he probably skipped dinner, not a good sign. His note says,

"Bot in Gnmrgn sell'n PWs. Shhut down Mem siphhon in Wilds, 3x-walled. HHh key stuck, gave up, tell IT whhhhhen they get in will ya? 'ave a good one bud."
Triple-walled. Ouch, that's bad.

2:31AM - Hmm, WoWii is surprisingly quiet.

2:51AM - Event log entry; suspected hacker:
CCUnit12: "Stop!"
L33t3rdanu: "fu"
CCUnit12: "Keep your hands where I can see them! Stop casting! Hey, don't you dare tp!"
L33t3rdanu: "bye!"
CCUnit12: "Dammit!"
3:31AM - Stephanie from the FF beat stopped by. She was holding her tea with both hands, slowly twirling her free pinky.
"Hi Ken"
"Hey Steph!"
"Whatcha have for breakfast?"
"Oh this? This isn't mine."
"Uh huh. Did you see that public? They need to install more cameras."
"I know! This is what, the fifth time?"
"Yeah. ... ... ..."
"Well, have fun."
"Ok... umm, I will."
Dammit! To her back and in my head: "I LOVE YOU!"

5:53AM - Found a repli-cloner. Had to call in the devs on this one. It was kinda funny, they all looked like Nixon. Final count was 3,200 when we got it under control, took a while. At times like these, I wish I had a piss bucket.

7:21AM - Finally made a kill today. He'll be back doing his thing in a couple hours. Why do we bother? I wonder if Steph is busy.


Hmm, ok, I take it back. That was mind-numbingly boring. What a shame, the phrase "anti-cybercrime division" sounds so cool!! Well, that just goes to show that crime fighting isn't cool if you don't get the possibility, no matter how remote, of blowing stuff up. That and getting sweet donuts.

(By the way, try this one day. If you get pulled over and cop asks, "Do you know why I pulled you over?" You say, "The donuts in the trunk?")

Oh yeah, Steph ends up dating Jones. Frank gets fired. Ken goes on to become President of the United States. The "H" is never fixed. The End.

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