Whispers in the noise

Some notes from the weekend:

1. Bob Dylan sings just fine, the problem is you're just too sober.
2. You're not allowed to have a "favorite" restaurant in a foreign country if you've only been to said foreign country once.
3. Inflation's a bitch. For the second time in a year, a homeless dude asked me for $100.
4. When I ask to buy a beer, chances are, I don't want the one sitting on the side... so don't make things awkward by asking.
5. The amount of loose change in your pocket is inversely proportional to your distance from an expired parking meter.
6. The 70% off warehouse sale IS too good to be true, move on.
7. Flowers cause selective blindness: Take any newspaper, then use it as a floor mat, to catch bbq drippings or as a bb gun target. Take same newspaper, use to wrap around roses and present package to a woman in your life. If she notices the paper, you didn't spend enough on the roses.
   
8. Late night television preys on our weakened sense of quality. Exhibit #1: Infomercials. Exhibit #2: Byron Allen's immortal career.
9. After the third date, it becomes acceptable to take home leftovers from dinner.
10. You can't leave a list with only 9 items.